on today's date.... those muffled rofls

on today's date we thought of defining irony, we can tell the difference, but can we define it? we can tell the difference between it and coincidence, certainly. we went to the high note, and who was working but brett who said, You'll be gone by halloween, right? I scoffed a scoff meaning, Of course I will, yeah or maybe, God, I fucking better be. he told me it was our anniversary. I looked at him, not wanting to, and he said, When we met, and I laugh muttered Oh yeah, and he told me that sun blood stories is playing a show on halloween with wooden indian burial ground. when I met brett & andy we danced together at the wooden indian burial ground concert. It's ironic, said brett as he wandered backwards away. I looked at my date & told him how this is a perfect example of what irony is not. after, I thought to look into my diaries of yesteryear. this is what I found for today's date, uncut, uncensored, unedited. and all that's left is, Did I do that? 

monday 30 july

salt tears

& the worst cramping. Waves of pain, maybe I do have cysts all over my ovaries. Isn’t this sad? I will never be able to give this birth.  I’ve a new long-distance boyfriend called Justin Ryan Fyfe. A super-unfortunate first two names but I like the ys and the double fff.

LAVA
for magma

i am in lincoln nebraska
my heart only bleeds when you open it
i screamed gin blossom lyrics
at a bar in omaha
how much of what i say
makes it to you
i was excited to go through tunnels
in west virginia
on the way back from the beach
the ocean is terrifying
i haven't said a word
to my father in over a year
and he tries to kill himself
and that sort of thing hurts me
i don't want people to feel
sorry
i am sorry
please forviv me
yr turqouise
i am i am the shades of a wasp
i am smoked in
i am in SP CE
listening to third eye blind
writing you a poem
did you write today
i am 28
and i forget
to drink
water
will you math me
will you hold my hand at the edge of a mountain
cliffs or the beach or the ocean is sky
my eyes are barely no years old
but i hear
or i can't listen from here
the wind over nebraska
lifts the cranes to other planets
kyle to the moon
you can call me
or i dont know why anyone would
imagine being stranded on a desert island
with your southwestern kitsch
am i missing south dakota
how do you say coyotes
what color are the hills on the moon
all these 90s hits i hear
break my heart
break my heart
break my heart
with a hammer
with the fist of rocketships
i am dreaming of clean water
but i cant dig deep enough
the earth wont open
where i am dry
is it too late tonight
are we just going
to skip to the end
i am asleep
i just woke up
it's nice to see you again

This is a Justin Ryan Fyfe original, the first no, no not the first, Erwin I think may have written one for me. But yes, from a person who doesn’t know me. Kyle’s best friend from Lincoln, NE.

After work, now. Tim made me a delicious salad with coconut chickensalad & greens of all sorts. He then brought me a plate of strawberries, chocolate, and whipped cream. What?!?

I'm hung on coincidence, now. & so quietly loling