himaybe

okay hi, it's hi, it's me, Me Merrill Stoddard






I think it's good here,  and the time is right
empty it up & feel good about it later
there was a girl in the dorms named Amanda
she had white bellbottoms, and I'd never thought anyone could be cooler,
she threw every plate in the wall at the breakup scene, in the bathtub too of course

she was my eskimo brother
it was the trick in the upstairs bathroom, next to the tv place
where on the  ouch
your arms around I saw
& bristly brush of face
& the disappointed nonvirgin  and she was heartbroken, & pure for it
I know why, even at the nightlit fountains and the spiderwebs all along the handrails, they're there all of the time even with all of the hands on them   so it would, but i do know why. I will never say
i dunno

at least I think none of us is a vegetarian again

27 february 2013 12:24 am

ringlets dripped down of wind

& the hot spicy tastes lingering awhile down my throat. This morning was looking too good could be true, I saw through dizzy fogged eyes out a window and through a fan, the orangeyellow leaves fluffed out a bit now, not drooping sad in the view. The sky a perfect ocean wash; I could see the tides breaking from where I sat squinting. Like a to be hot day on the coast, but during that time of pre-heat, (though in truth I think proves perfect out, and oh such fall. Autumnal in all its obviousness. I will never close these parentheses. My hair has little knots at its ends. I let the fan blow no matter the temperament of day. I like the slow accordion sound. I like the spicy herbs, dandilion leaves. I like the cold ankles, the anticipatory shower, & poems written for you, & the little documentations of love, & the secret smile at corners of my mouth (in regard), And those trees everblowing more and more orange everyday! Like to change the seasons, already! And the full hunter's moon, tonight, which is why then I stopped to bleed, which is why I urge vocally in silence for you to return to me, this subtle soft sour I have for you, to glean in these bright fields, to roam among my fattened deer. & something about the excitement, feeling heartbroken when hearing a peice of music or reading something tantalizing, and falling in love & dying in the same moment at the fear awe of something so bewildering, so great; and this all of this is a bit like that but without the right words to describe. Every minute & then again every week-end. But my moon is bright and my deer are fat. And my arms stay open late.