"...she kissed me thrice with more mouth than meaning..."

"...as if woman's love were springwater containing the salubrious salts which at the least notice she ever so willingly gave anyone to drink..."

(12/2/10)

Dear Diary, today I:

Missed someone, exponentialled my own self sexually, lost two games of cribbage, wound around denver with goals, removed the disgusting lavender nailpolish in front of the grocery, pet labs, drank rollingrocks, & coffee, read a beautiful Nabokov, surprised myself in phonecalls

third day of hanukkah, denver, colorado

In the land, again. The echoes of everything. I have talked about them all, to one another. Their opinions support my defense... but how will I defend? can I, will I? What happened to you?

I know for what reasons I am unwilling. I will never be the continual shoulder, I will never be the shovel with which to  undig. I will defend your honor as long as I've reason to. Will fight & win for proof of loyalty. What will you be?

The good, solid fires, the surprise on a beautiful face, the accepted touchings with meanders, the sunshine and wearing socks & scarfless, the failure of a horrific nailpolish which remains not in memory... The words for other words. I feel proud consistently for achieving such constants of love.

songs for why not

Dear Diary, today I:

Missed someone, exponentialled my own self sexually, lost two games of cribbage, wound around denver with goals, (achieving them!) removed the disgusting lavender nailpolish in front of the grocery, pet labs, drank rollingrocks, & coffee, read a beautiful Nabokov, surprised myself in phonecalls, reminisced, celebrated, ate burritos a million years old, reassessed, reclined, became rejuvenated, loved life, wore my norwegian sweater & canada coat in delicious combination, lamented, made inner promises, reconnected, read Virginia Woolf for the first time, and attempted love for the millionth. Denver is smiling & sunny, and who knows about it all.